Monthly Business Revenue Report (November 2023)
Facts and figures and other gems from this month
I was committed to writing this up on December 1 but I was too busy falling in love. And fucking. (See previous article.)
Let’s look at the cash numbers:
5 recurring monthly subscriptions for Substack x $8.00 = $40.00
1 new client (who was a client a few times before) = $900
Tip from the new client = $5,000
Total November Revenue: $5,940
Previous months for reference:
September Revenue: $692
October Revenue: $1,090.39
I went into November thinking that I was probably not going to make any money this month because I was not very interested in making money.
For me, building a business includes expressing myself, coaching others, supporting others in some other way, making connections, selling, and marketing. Some of those things overlap, and some of those activities require a particular kind of energy and mind space.
I was not in the mind space to show up in a way that felt aligned with selling, and I was okay with that because I was occupied by other projects in my life, such as writing and meeting people outside of my business. I was also capable of doing this in large part because of the wealth privilege I have in my life.
That is how I wanted to experience my humanity this past month.
Toward the end of the month, I began getting curious about how I want to sell again because there was an urge brewing within me to partner with clients on very specific issues that I started seeing around me. As a result, I am going through another transitional period in my business where I am crafting an offer that I am excited about.
I am at a place where I want to experience and express my humanity that way.
This brings me to a big lesson from this month: just because you own a business doesn’t mean that selling needs to be the main way you show up in the world.
Selling is one way we express our truth.
So are building relationships, texting, sexting, having sex, writing an email, laughing, sharing a drink, arguing, listening.
When I sell because I think I have to, then I am more likely to do all the other things because I think I have to.
I mean, imagine having sex because you have to. I’ve done this many times before. It’s not how I want to show up in the world. It’s not congruent. It’s pretty much lying.
I don’t like living like this. Which is why I am always inquiring about what is going on inside that is not being reflected on the outside. Where am I incongruent? Where am I lying to myself about what I really want?
These are important questions in part because when we forego our own desires and expressions, that is what we are being examples of to our community.
When I silence myself, I am subconsciously selling to my clients that their silence and suppression is acceptable.
That is not what I want to sell in my business. What I want to sell is the practice of sharpening our self expression, and that begins with my embodiment of that work. Marketing is language and communication that results from my embodiment of that work.
To that end, I honor the slowness, gentleness, and realness of the pace of my humanity, and that is what I decided to do this month.
Which is why, when the new past client showed up out of literally nowhere, I was able to congruently receive his money and exorbitant tip that he left in addition to paying the highest tier on the sliding scale.
Let me tell you what I shared on Instagram my reflections from what exactly happened with the new client and why it was important:
Client had paid $6,000 for three months 2 years ago and $10,000 for 4 months almost a year ago. He reached out to work with me again.
Me: I am boycotting capitalism. My pricing for 10 sessions is on a sliding scale between $600-$900.
Client: You mean, per session, right?
Me: Nope, total.
He was like, almost offended and insisted on paying more. 😂 So I sent him a link to a tip jar.
He tipped $5,000 in addition to the $900 and said he wants to pay more later. He said that I was better than any other form of support that he had received.*
*Note: This doesn’t mean that I am objectively better than other people he got support from. It just means it was his experience. (Which is why I don’t do testimonials anymore, but more on that later.)
The important part is not the dollar amount. This is not about “how to manifest money” because I will tell you right now that very little of this had to do with some personal secret manifesting strategies.
99% of this had to do with the unearned resources I have in taking my sweet ass time building my craft and my relationships and my community. (So, on a side note, if you want to “manifest” anything, what I’ll tell you is to take a hard look at your privileges first to account for what you already have if you want to have what you want.)
What is important here is that I got to experience his love and appreciation in a very real way because it was the way he wanted to show it to me.
When I was running a *~six figure business~* I would get a dopamine rush whenever a client made a big payment and I would try to chase that rush by spending most of it on the next coach and the next program and the next shiny thing.
The thoughtfulness and the love behind the transaction was not a currency I even considered…until I ran out of investments I wanted to make because I saw that what sustained me was not more knowledge & more capital but all the thoughtfulness and love that my clients were already offering me with their whole hearts.
I mean, this doesn’t mean that I don’t want to have any money at all. I just celebrated this income by spending $50 on three jars of slime that I had been eyeballing for a while. Money is great.
I just find it tedious to spend so much time on “keeping the cash flow going” for the sake of my acceptability to oppressive capitalistic systems while I watch the world decay and burn down around me.
It is just not how I want to use my privilege and unearned resources.
I want to invest all of it in relationships that feel generative and sustainable. Ones where I can let my hair down. Ones where we can see each others’ souls even in silence. Ones where we can be reckless and insecure and human together.
Because without it, it becomes harder to hear my own heart beat.
When we cannot hear our own heart beat, we cannot care about what we want to care about competently.
Whether it’s a $5,000 tip or an unexpected FaceTime or a genuine ass laughter in your presence, may we unwire ourselves of the need to receive love and appreciation only in the form of cash when it comes to building our community and business.
May we give and receive only in the ways that feel most truthful so that there is never a moment where we feel the need to pretend.
Life is too short and sacred for our heart beats to go unheard.
I took another step in decolonizing my business by unsubscribing from yet another rule that there was any requirement on my part to show up in a certain way in my business.
I spent another month honoring my truth of not selling. In the coming weeks, I am going to honor my truth by selling because that is what I feel compelled to do as part of my self expression.
And the best part is that I can change my mind and try all kinds of experiments anytime, and no one can police the way I conduct my business.
This is another way I hear my heart beat.
Whether you are an entrepreneur or otherwise - I implore you - what is keeping you silent, and how do *you* want to hear your own heart beat? What scary experiment do you want to try?
That is not just an entrepreneurial thing. It is a human thing.
How do you want to be human today?